Status Quo

Sorry for the lapse in posting, as I know there are many out there concerned for us, our surrogate, and our little one.  Thank you to all who have emailed asking if everything was OK.  I have been feeling somewhat ambivalent about blogging, and thus the lack of posts.  Besides the fact that I don't have much to report, I feel like our bad luck is lingering over us, which has thrown a wet blanket on our excitement about the pregnancy and all these early developmental milestones we would otherwise be celebrating, sharing, and blogging about.

Meanwhile, Meera, our surrogate, is still in the hospital due to bleeding from the previously disclosed SCH.  It has now been almost an entire month since she was admitted.  It must be terribly difficult for her to be on complete bed rest, away from her family and personal comforts.  Hopefully her husband and four year old son get to visit her often and are making do without her best they can.  We feel bad that she was also in the hospital over Mother's Day, but we mailed her a card and were informed by SCI that they received it in time and translated it for her.  They relayed that she appreciated it and sent us her best wishes just the same.  We've been told that she seems to be staying in good spirits, considering, and we are grateful for that and for her sacrifice.

Unfortunately, according to our last USG report over a week ago, the bleed has grown to 6.9 x 4.3 cm, which has kept Meera in the hospital on strict bed rest.  However, the baby appears to be developing fine.  Possibly more than fine, as the report noted that the baby's approximate gestational age was calculated to be several weeks ahead of schedule at 13W6D at the time of the scan.  By that measure, we would be in the second trimester already!  However, Dr. Shivani said the scans were not totally accurate and could be off +/- 2 weeks, which makes sense based on our transfer date, we would only be around 12 weeks tomorrow.

We continue to receive daily updates from SCI.  "Update" seems to be a bit of a misnomer, as there really hasn't been much change.  To be honest, the emails have started to run together as they sound so much alike, and I commend Yogita for being able to provide us Meera's status without simply copying and pasting yesterday's email verbatim.  There is always her pleasant greeting, and then acknowledgement that Meera is still in the hospital and that the doctors have noted varying amounts of bleeding ("mild" to "minimal" to "some" to "on and off" etc.).  She notes that Meera is receiving supplements and medication, being observed/reviewed/monitored, and being cared for well by the staff of coordinators, social workers, nurses, and/or doctors.  Basically:

We are getting accustomed to the emails and I am sometimes dismayed that I have become a bit casual about them.  At first, I used to open them with a mixture of anticipation and dread, bracing myself for the news, good or bad.  Now we have come to know what to expect: wake up, check the phone for the email, then forward to family, and roll out of bed to get ready for work.  Of course we still worry, but a certain routine has developed and we have since given up trying to decipher from the description of the amount of bleeding if Meera is getting better. 

We just hope and pray that she does.