Developments

Well, it has been quite a week since I last blogged!  There were new developments in India that we were made aware of through Dr. Shivani's blog.  Letters were sent to non-married clients to inform them that their treatments were being postponed.  What a sad day for all those who had planned for months, maybe even years, to go to India to complete their families.  Regardless of marital status, only those traveling under medical visas will be permitted to undergo any surrogacy procedure (sperm/egg collection, IVF, etc.).  We even read blogs of these IP who had made arrangements and bookings, only to be told they cannot have any treatment performed.  We understand the heartbreaking disappointment when a cycle has to be cancelled, which happened on our third attempt when the surrogate just wasn't suitably ready for the fresh transfer.

We held our breath last week waiting to receive this such letter, yet hoping we were in the "grey zones" that might allow us to continue since we had frozen embryos that were scheduled for transfer in May.  Imagine our surprise when we received a letter informing us that our transfer was planned for next week!  Apparently we were benefiting from one of these poor clients whose treatment was being postponed, whose surrogate was in the middle of being prepared for their cycle.  It was a bittersweet moment, since we felt sorry for that parent/s but excited that we could try again so soon.  The political crackdown is making us so nervous that we are even more anxious to get pregnant before an Indian iron curtain comes down.  (Sorry for the dramatics, but this roller coaster has me a bit emotional!)

We also learned that this is the same surrogate that we used in the previous cycle.  We shot off an email to Meg with a few questions.  We expressed our desire to definitely proceed with the cycle and our previous surrogate, but wanted to know the following:

1. We understand that it usually takes a couple weeks to prepare a surrogate for transfer, so were we the beneficiaries of someone else's cancelled cycle due to the regulations?  We were.  There were a few cycles cancelled from first-time clients that were booked around the end of last year.  Until SCI gets something in writing from the government about people being able to continue booked treatment, they don't want to take any risks.  I applaud the clinic for doing this and not exposing their clients to legal risks.  The regulations seem arbitrary and discriminatory, lacking foresight in planning and execution.
2. Should we have any concerns about using the same surrogate?  It would have been our choice under ideal circumstances--which we fully understand is not the case--to use a different surrogate, just to change the variables; however, we trust Dr. Shivani's judgment and know she has our best interests at heart, but just wondering if there was any data on using the same surrogate after a failed attempt?  Meg said this is medically fine to use the same surrogate again, as it is so difficult to tell what makes a cycle successful or not after everything medically possible has been done.  Besides, there is a rule as of last week from the FRRO that new contracts must be signed in India, and using the same surrogate avoids us having to fly to India to sign a new contract with a different surrogate.
3. Is it OK to blog about this?  Meg said it was fine, it was just a delay for a few others, but they expect good news soon.  We felt guilty about benefiting from someone else's misfortune, and didn't want to create any burden on the doctor, staff or client managers with having to possibly field more questions or complaints.  We also didn't want to expose ourselves to any negative attention, even though we do not believe anything is being done improperly.  The main reason to blog is that we want to share this information with others who are or will be in the same position, as we have not seen similar details discussed in other blogs yet.

Like I said above, we feel fortunate to be able to continue our journey to completing our family.  In a way, having the procedure so soon gives us less time to build up the anticipation.  But on the other hand, each subsequent attempt heightens the expectations to finally cross the goal line to becoming pregnant.  Even then, there will be more hurdles, more excruciating trials, and what will seem like an interminable wait.  We realize for us now, this quest was never going to be a sprint; it is turning out to be a marathon, an odyssey.  And if we reach the finish line and bring our baby home, I know that it will have all been worth it.  Thanks to everyone for continuing on this voyage with us.